Ask Auntie Artichoke

Expert on Parenting and Family Relationships

Ask Auntie Artichoke - Expert on Parenting and Family Relationships

Devastating Injury: How To Combat The Whirlpool of Why Me?

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Devastating Injury: How To Combat The Whirlpool of Why Me?

If you’ve experienced an injury, you may find yourself sidetracked by pain and depression. Whether your injury is long-term or short, it’s common to be plagued by feelings of anxiety, despair, and the “why me” syndrome. The following tips can help you get back on the road to recovery.

Seek Help from Friends and Family

An injury can cause severe emotional and physical pain, especially if the injuries are serious. It can be especially bothersome if you’re out of work for a long period of time. Family, friends and other loved ones can help pick up the slack and offer their physical assistance through these difficult times. This could include running errands, meals and financial help.

Having someone to talk to when the going gets most difficult can also prove beneficial. Try to seek out professional and legal assistance when it comes to dealing with your feelings regarding your injury. These resources can greatly impact your road to recovery.

Psychological Assistance

A therapist can provide professional and knowledgeable assistance through a difficult injury. Feelings of loneliness and insecurity can allow your depression to skyrocket. However, good communication throughout the entire process can be good for your physical and emotional well-being. It can also contribute to a successful recovery. It may even help to discuss your plight with other individuals who are in a similar situation. Your therapist may have ideas on the best support groups necessary in order to deal with your pain and frustration.

Get Moving

While you may be sidelined with pain and depression, a physical therapist can help you through the discomfort. Instead of feeling sorry for yourself, a physical therapist can offer exercises that can help speed up the recovery process. A healthy diet and exercise go hand-in-hand, so you can concentrate on foods that can fight inflammation and depression. Some excellent sources include fruits, vegetables, low-fat dairy, whole-grains, nuts and fish. Water is also a great resource that can help boost your mood and nurture your heart and soul.

Legal Help

A personal injury attorney can aid a worker in their recovery by ensuring that they receive the type of compensation for their work related injuries. This is especially important if you’re the breadwinner of the family, and you have bills to pay. The legal process in regards to an injury can pose some serious challenges, and you may need to keep on top of physician visits, receipts, doctor’s reports and claims. You may also be at a loss in regards to the rules and regulations involved with this type of injury. A personal injury attorney can be your source of comfort throughout the process, so you can concentrate on making a full recovery. This can also alleviate the stress and depression that often accompanies a workers comp injury.

Being out of work after an accident can be hard for an individual, especially if a painful injury accompanies the loss. Symptoms to look out for include feelings of despair, hopelessness, irritability, fatigue and sadness. Your physician can offer suggestions to help conquer your work-related depression. While medication can’t alleviate the problems, it can help you deal with severe pain that may be clouding your outlook on your recovery. In addition to a physician, a personal injury attorney can help you reap the costs associated with your accident, so you can focus on leading a better life.

Helping her husband through the mental and physical rehabilitation after suffering an ischemic stroke, Nadine Swayne understands the depths of despair an injury can cause and offers this information.
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Control Conflict With Confidence

Hello from beautiful Montana:

Conflict is inevitable. As long as we have at least two human beings interacting, we will have at least two opinions on how things should be done. You cannot avoid conflict, but you can control it with confidence and a desire to find peaceful solutions.

Have you ever been drawn into a match of wills at work or home only to find that once you jumped in, you could not find a graceful way out? Maybe you were hoping that the other person would just give up or someone would come along to rescue you.

I have listed some ideas for you to use to rescue yourself. Read and reread and then practice these behaviors and you will see less conflict and more cooperation.

Four Confidence Clues

  1. Speak in short sentences. Say what you need to say, but don’t belittle the situation or the other person with long explanations. For instance, instead of saying; “Look you jerk, I worked my tail off preparing that report and all you could do is find one little error and want me to do it over again and I don’t have the time or energy to rework something that is good enough for most people.”  How about saying; “I see the error you are concerned about.”
  2. Slow down your emotional response. Your first response is usually knee jerk reaction of revealing all the resentment, anger and justification of your actions.  Your rate of speech will be very rapid and fast.  When we speak rapidly, we often make mistakes or say things that are better left unsaid.  Our mind also races ahead of our ability to think and form our answers. You will want to slow down so that you appear to be rational and mature.
  3. Watch your body language. Verbal communication is the language of information. Body or non verbal communication is the language of relationships.  If your arms are crossed and foot is tapping, it sends a defensive signal right away to the other person. If possible, take a few deep breaths, put your shoulders back and put one hand in your pocket and the other hanging loosely at your side.
  4. Deepen your voice. Stress and anger can tighten your vocal cords, making your voice come out high and screech like.  This higher pitch sends a message that you are vulnerable and emotionally overwrought.  When you breathe as listed above, you will naturally relax and you will feel and hear a deeper, more confident voice coming out of your mouth.                                                                                                                                                                                                     Your goal is not to avoid conflict, because that is impossible, but to control it with confidence and courage.

You can do it. I have confidence in you.  If you would like to build more confidence in yourself

You will be glad you made the decision to build your self confidence so you can control conflict in your life.  How have you handled conflict in the past? Has that method worked for you? Leave a comment and let’s start a dialog about controlling conflict with confidence.

Your Friend,

Judy Helm Wright aka Auntie Artichoke, family relationship author and keynote speaker

Low Self Esteem? Build Confidence

Hello from beautiful Montana:

Are you or someone you love overcome with low self esteem? A belief system which implies that you are less than others and not deserving of happiness is not serving you well.  Each one of us is born with a gift or destiny. It is important that you find ways and means to build confidence and raise your self-esteem.

Build Confidence With Positive Affirmations

Our thoughts and belief systems are continually running through our minds.  Are your thoughts mostly positive or negative?  Thoughts are like plants in a garden, when you plant a bean (or positive thought) you get multiples of beans. You will want to plant a series of hope, success, happiness and enthusiasm seeds of positive affirmations.

Affirmations are statements of belief.  Your subconscious does not grade or evaluate them.  It just tries to make the actions of the individual (you) make them come true. The more you repeat a statement, the more the mind will hear the message and  encourage your physical body to follow the encouragement.

Affirmations For High Self-Esteem

  • I am a worthy person who treats others and myself with respect.
  • I am a successful problem solver and find creative solutions.
  • I draw others to me who are kind, thoughtful and helpful.
  • I  take care of my body and mind so I can appreciate all my talents.
  • I am brave, courageous, and unafraid to change ways and thoughts that are not working for my highest good.

Negative Thoughts and Low Self-Esteem Unwelcome

I have confidence in your ability to encourage a positive attitude and high self-esteem. You can do it.  You are worthy of the respect of your peers, family and friends. Just keep planting positive affirmations in your mind and acting in a confident manner.

If you need assistance, please go to:

You will be glad you did.

In gratitude,

Judy Helm Wright aka Auntie Artichoke, family relationship author and motivational speaker