Ask Auntie Artichoke

Expert on Parenting and Family Relationships

Ask Auntie Artichoke - Expert on Parenting and Family Relationships

Help Your Child Make Friends (expert)

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The Left Out Child: The Importance of Friendship answers these and other questions:
What can parents do to guide the social development of their young children?
Why is it important to be included?
Is it harder to make friends now than it used to be?
How important is it to help your child be more likeable?
What do I do if the teacher or coach doesn’t like my child?
How do I comfort my child when they are picked last or not at all?
How do I help my child overcome shyness and build confidence?
Is there a gender difference in friendships?
What about bullies, should parents intervene?
Ages and stages of friendship
Social skills are simple, but not easy
Ten ways to help your child make friends
15 ways to help kids like themselves

Mean Girls & Tough Boys–Bullying At Any Age (EXPERT)

Tough boys and Mean girls have always been around. Bullying is a catch-all phrase for an imbalance of power or strength that is either real or perceived. There is a potential for the greater power to intentionally threaten or harm the weaker one. This power struggles usually takes place over a sustained period of time and has the potential to escalate into violence. Bullying can harm indivduals, families, schools and communties. For more information please see http://www.cyberbullyinghelp.com

Does My Son Have An Eating Disorder?

Does Your Son Have An Eating Disorder? Often people think of anorexia and a vision of a girl pops into our mind. However, there are many young men who also suffer from poor body image and develop eating disorders. This article contains tips to spot an eating disorder with your son and methods to overcome and prevent it. Get the facts on eating issues and disorders here. You will be glad you did. http://www.AskAuntieArtichoke.com

What Should Be First Foods For Babies?

When to begin solid food for babies is a question many parents wonder about. Breast milk is the perfect choice of nourishment and most doctors and successful mothers suggest sticking just with breast milk for at least six months. Learn more about parenting and family relationships at http://www.AskAuntieArtichoke.com

How To Brake Your Teen’s Speeding!

teen girl driver

 

 

 

 

 

How To Brake Your Teen’s Speeding!

Handing your teenager the keys to the car can be a conflicting experience. You want your teenager to learn how to drive safely and know how to handle a car while on the road. At the same time, you want to protect your child from the dangers that come with driving on today’s roadways. A significant part of this learning process involves teaching your child to obey the posted speed limit. Getting a speeding ticket can be costly and put a dent in your teenager’s driving record. When you want to put a brake on your teen driver’s propensity for speeding, you can use these methods to your parental advantage.

Implement a Driving Contract

Many parents today use a driving contract to keep their young drivers on the right side of the law. A typical contract states that a teenager will obey the speed limit and have privileges withheld for every infraction of this rule. You may allow for a first-time offense simply because even the best of drivers sometimes forget the posted speed limit or forget to slow down in key places like school or construction zones. Even so, when you implement a driving contract and enforce it fully, you could curb your teen’s temptation to speed.

Enroll in Traffic School

Driver’s education classes and a traffic school course can differ in key ways. Driver’s education that is offered at most high schools tends to encompass many important lessons in the span of a few weeks and arguably protects students from some of the harsher realities of driving too fast. Traffic school, however, is typically held outside of the public education system and therefore is not held to the same coddling standards as high school classes. If you want your teen to see pictures and videos of what happens after a speed-induced wreck, you could enroll them in traffic school and expose your teen to a more thorough approach to learning how to drive safely.

Know the Legal Remedies for Speeding

Your teen arguably will never learn to drive within the posted limit if you them to continue without any consequences. Rather than pay the fines for this infraction yourself, for example, you should have your teen pay the ticket by using their own allowance or paycheck.

However, sometimes your teen may genuinely be innocent and be wrongfully ticketed for this offense. Cameras that are posted on traffic lights supposedly catch drivers who go to fast or breeze through red lights. If your teen has been wrongfully charged, you should hire a lawyer to evaluate the evidence and help your child avoid being fined or punished in court. Throughout this process, it is key that you include your teenager and rely on whatever evidence your child has to support their claim of innocence.

Before you allow your child out onto the road and into busy traffic, however, you should know the best ways to put the brake on your teen’s speeding. These methods could spare you a lot of worry and your family a lot of expense in paying traffic tickets.

Nadine Swayne knows how hard it is for parents to adjust to their teen driving. It can be a nerve-wracking time for all but instilling rules and consequences will hopefully curb any errant driving habits.

Photo credit: https://flic.kr/p/da7JT8

Thank you for being part of our community of kind, thoughtful people who have respect for all.  Be sure to claim your  free download and find out how to have Judy Helm Wright aka “Auntie Artichoke” speak at your next convention or in-service.  You can contact her at http://www.judyhwright.com. You will be glad you did.

 

5 Great Bike Safety Apps Every Parent Should Get!

Kid bike ride
5 Great Bike Safety Apps Every Parent Should Get!

Today’s technological apps can make learning fun for your children. They are also equipped to keep your child safe whether they are navigating an open trail or traveling to and from school via the street. The following are five great safety apps every parent should download.

1. Bike Safety

If you’re looking for your child to learn the basic rules, the Bike Safety app is great for road users. Here you’ll learn everything from the correct way to cross the street and how to understand the various road signs. Your child can also gain confidence through this app by learning about the correctly clothing for better visibility and safety. Sharing the road with other cars and riders can prove dangerous if you don’t know what to do. To ensure that you avoid collisions and prevent unnecessary injuries, the Bike Safety app has current laws and rules for both children and adults.

2. Bike Smart and Walk Smart

Whether your child is a novice or expert bike rider, accidents and injuries can still occur. Fortunately, a technological company has come up with specific applications to help prevent childhood injuries. Designed for children between the ages of 5 and 9, Bike Smart and Walk Smart hopes to teach children core bicycle skills through game based animated videos. The quizzes and tests also provide immediate feedback.

3. Bicycle Run

If your child is looking to hone their skills on a bicycle, Bicycle Run is a fun and exciting way to competitively race with their friends and family members. In addition to basic trails, the app allows you to navigate hills and different terrain in hopes of making your child a better rider.

4. Bike Repair HD

Your child’s safety is of the highest priority whether they are heading off to school or a friend’s house to play. In addition to knowing the rules of the road and basics in bike safety, your child’s bike needs to run properly. This includes everyday problems such as flat tires, a busted chain and lackluster brakes. Bike Repair HD has close to 38 guides with over 50 problems experienced by bicycle riders. The app will also teach your child solutions to some basic problems using an easy to understand guide.

5. Amber Alert GPS

While you may think you live in a safe neighborhood, certain dangers do exist and can prove harmful to your child. Bike riding is an important activity for children. Fortunately, the Amber Alert GPS system works with your child’s cellphone to alert you of your child’s whereabouts. If they venture outside of the parameters that you deem safe or get into an accident, the app notifies you via email or text alert. It can also send an alert if your child comes within 500 feet of a registered sex offender’s residence. There’s also the SOS feature that allows them immediate access to help in case of an emergency.

Outdoor activities are important to your child’s health and wellness. It can also help combat childhood obesity and diabetes. While bike riding can be an excellent way for them to get exercise, it can also put them at risk for injuries. Fortunately, protecting your child through bike safety and education can prove helpful when you utilize the above smartphone apps.

As a child, freelance writer Nadine Swayne rode her bike for miles with friends. Fortunately, that was a different time in the world when things were a little safer. Nowadays, parents must have an eagle eye on their children, even during simple activities such as riding a bike or at the playground. These cellphone apps will certainly help to ease a parent’s minds on their child’s safety.
Photo credit: https://flic.kr/p/dRw6hB

Thank you for being part of our community of kind, thoughtful people who have respect for all.  Be sure to claim your  free download and find out how to have Judy Helm Wright aka “Auntie Artichoke” speak at your next convention or in-service.  You can contact her at http://www.judyhwright.com. You will be glad you did.

 

 

Teaching & Modeling Empowerment (EXPERT)

How does a parent, grandparent, mentor or teacher model empowerment and confidence to the kids in their circle of influence?

The primary way anything is taught to children is through modeling. We show them the behavior we desire.  From the time they are infants, children are constantly watching and mimicking what we do and say.

They May Not Do What You Say, But What You Do

If there is a discrepancy between what we do and what we say, they learn a whole different lesson than what we set out to teach.  If you are giving your child a lecture on lying, then the phone rings and you tell him to say you aren’t home if it is your crazy Aunt Mabel, which behavior do you think he will adapt in his life?

The most important way to convey the lessons of encouragement, empowerment and confidence is to show them how to behave, or model the behavior.  The most effective way to teach your child he or she has the power to take positive action and make changes in behavior is to allow them to see you work through challenges.  We need to walk the walk, and guide them to persist in the process of a lifelong learning experience.

Teach Problem Solving

Teach and mentor others something that will improve their lives.  Sometimes just a word or gesture that shows you have confidence in their ability to problem solve gives them courage to move forward. Help them to achieve goals they can’t reach by themselves.  Empower them to succeed.

Every situation has at least five solutions.  Help them to help themselves in all areas of life. Encourage them to look at a problem from different angles and perspectives.

Acknowledge & Appreciate Success

Many of the people in your life who are top performers may be limiting their effectiveness because they don’t realize just how good they are. The greatest gift we can do for others is not to share our riches but to reveal theirs.

confidence, empowerment, problem solving, Judy Helm Wright, Auntie Artichoke, EXPERT,

Children will not always do what you say, but usually will do what you do. Model confidence

At a recent parenting class I was talking about discovering the accomplishments of their children. The goal was to have them recognize their own strengths, skills and talents. I started with a ball thrown to a participant with the instruction to yell out something they were good at and then throw the ball to another person.

Surprisingly, many of the participants had great difficulty recognizing and acknowledging their own special talents.  It took some gentle prodding and suggestions from others for them to see themselves in a new and powerful light.

Once we got going it was much easier to recognize that not everyone can make delicious chocolate chip cookies.  It is a skill to be able to be able to return an item to a store that not everyone has.  It takes someone special to be able to bring peace to a conflict at work.

Part of empowering others is to make sure we recognize and applaud our own accomplishments.  Many have been taught to not get “a big head” or that “that’s not so special.”  We need to help them reveal to themselves and others what great gifts they have been given.

 

Third Party Credibility

 

I remember hearing the phrase “Criticize in private, Praise in public” and it really seemed like a good idea to incorporate in my business and personal life.  Since the word criticize has some bad connotations for me, I prefer to use the word feedback or mentor.

You will find more about that philosophy in my parenting book How to Discipline Without Damage.

Whenever you get a chance to brag about someone do it.  That is called third party credibility and carries a lot of weight.  How do I know?  Because I leave reviews on YELP, recommendations on Angie’s list and write testimonials for people I do business with.

Don’t allow your children, friends and associates to dismiss or ignore a success.  Reveal their victories to them by documenting success on performance reviews or testimonials on Linked In or YELP. Send them a note of congratulations. Post a Hurrah on Facebook. Let them know that you noticed and were impressed with their success.

It takes so little time to empower and encourage others and yet many would prefer to be part of the destruction crew rather than the builders and enhancers of others.  I have never quite got why so many people will cheer for their team to win a football game but won’t give their own kid a high-five and an atta-boy.

Self-Awareness Quiz

  1. Do you acknowledge your own successes out loud and in your mind?  Practice saying “Yay Me.”
  2. Do you share the success of others in public by compliments, reviews and testimonials?
  3. Do you model confidence in finding solutions and assuming your own power?

Would You Benefit From A Private Coaching Session?

If so, then contact me at www.JudyHWright.com and let’s find a time to discover if we resonate and can travel the empowerment journey together.

You will be glad you did.  It costs nothing to ask and the benefits are priceless. See www.judyhwright.com  today.

 

 

Learning Disabled Teens & Teasing (EXPERT)

Learning Disabled Teens And Teasing – No Easy Answers

Expert Author Judy H. Wright

Parents, teachers, extended family and neighbors recognize the special challenges of those who love and teach learning disabled children and adults. They are usually sensitive, kind and giving as small children. Because they are small in stature, people are more forgiving of what they can and cannot do.

Teenagers With Learning Disabilities

However, as these cute little kids grow into teens and adults, they have accelerated difficulties. He/she is still very dependent, while becoming harder to control, guide and teach. The skills may be delayed, but the body and hormones are changing daily. A LD teen may not understand or confuse many aspects of life when in social situations. Sensitive to others anyway, this teen may react negatively to any correction or criticism. What may have started out as casual banter, may be interpreted as hurtful teasing.

Learning disabilities can make the social scene very hard for teens.

Brain disorders are expressed in many strange ways, included a frenzy of hyperactivity. This hyperactivity may irritate the very people the teen is hoping to attract as friends.

Teens With Learning or Physical Disability May Become Target of Teasing

As I have said in many of the previous posts and articles-bullying and teasing is about power. The bully looks for someone who can be manipulated or humiliated in order to make himself/herself feel more important. The majority of learning disable adolescents do not have social skills and the ability to communicate in order to stop the teasing. Self esteem and confidence is not easy to come by in any teenager, but may be especially lacking in those who have severe physical or learning abilities. The amount of teasing, bullying, name calling and taunting that goes on in Special Ed classes and in the hallways of schools internationally, is overwhelming. This is especially true in junior high and high school when independence is encouraged and tattling is discouraged.

What Should Teachers and Parents Do

Kindness and empathy for others hopefully is an on-going conversation in your home and classroom. Help all children, but especially those that have learning and social difficulties, to determine if it is a big problem or a small problem. If it is a small problem help them come up with techniques or ideas to solve it themselves. If it is a big problem, which involves safety, help them to communicate either with the bully or with an adult. Tattling is to get someone in trouble. Telling is to save someone from harm.

Self Awareness Quiz

1. What do you think when you see a learning disabled teen?

2. Do you feel that you have nothing in common?

3. Would you step up and intervene or find help if you saw someone being teased?

4. Do you agree with the difference between tattling and telling?

5. Can you decide what is a big problem and what is a small problem in life?

You are a smart and strong person and I have confidence you will find good solutions to help support not only learning disabled teens, but others who are being teased and bullied. Be sure to claim your free report about bullying at http://www.cyberbullyinghelp.com

Thank you for being part of a community of kind, thoughtful people who want respect for all.

You have permission to reprint this article in your blog or newsletter as long as you keep the complete content and contact information intact.Thank you, Judy Helm Wright aka “Auntie Artichoke”

Teen Headed To College? 5 Off-Campus Housing Tips

Built-Ins and Fireplace

Teen Headed To College? 5 Off-Campus Housing Tips

According to the U.S. Census Bureau, 30 percent of all first-year students live on campus, and an additional 27 percent live off-campus away from their parents. However, when college students are included, from freshmen to seniors, on-campus housing is only utilized by 20 percent of the nationwide student body. 

Clearly a large percentage of students will eventually need off-campus housing. Fortunately, there is a wide variety of rental options available, including houses, but it is essential for students and parents to carefully consider many factors before selecting a place to rent or buy. If the main objective is for the parents to buy a property that the child can use during his college years, and then turn it into an investment property after, you must look at the following points from both sides of the coin, as a lessee and lessor.

Five Things To Look For In Off-Campus Housing

1. Renting or Buying – It is necessary to stay within a reasonable budget, but you also need to consider the fact that each area has an average rental rate. Attempting to go too far below this rate will force students to live in areas that are undesirable. Therefore, you should research the area under consideration. For example, if your college-bound teen wants to attend school in Austin, Texas, you can look up average rental rates online or consult an experienced realtor to help you explore your options and set an appropriate budget. A directory such as Movoto will help you localize the search areas since Austin is home to numerous universities and colleges. As buyers, parents need to look into areas that properties have a history of holding their value.

How about being the landlord instead of the tenant? You could purchase a house near campus, install your son or daughter, and pay off the mortgage by renting rooms to other coeds. This is a great way to house your college student, invest in income property, and generate income long term—as a landlord—or short term—by selling up after your young genius graduates.

2. Solid Security – For most parents facing an empty nest, their child’s safety is as important as their education. Obviously gated apartment complexes with on-site security patrols are preferable for the student and for their parent’s peace of mind. If this is beyond your budget, you can still research the crime statistics online by zip code, and the local police department can give you detailed information about a specific neighborhood. Keep in mind that the cheaper the rent is, the more likely it is that the house or apartment might be located in or near a high crime area. Even if the asking sale price might be affordable, consider how easily or difficult it would be for you to rent to other students in that area.

3. Responsive Landlord – Many people have funny or scary stories from their college years about having rented an apartment from a slumlord. Today, even for the most fearless or adventurous student, that’s simply not a wise option. Signing on the dotted line with an unresponsive landlord can mean signing up for all kinds of headaches: minimal security; poor lighting in hallways; neglected electrical and plumbing repairs; and infrequent trash collection, to name a few. If the student has a car, does the landlord provide safe well-lit parking near the building?

An indifferent absentee landlord can leave students to fend for themselves in a stressful environment, and this is not conducive to proper studying. Look for online reviews of the landlord under consideration. Talk to current tenants about their experiences. Scrutinize the lease carefully before signing.

When you are the landlord, you need to treat your renters in the same way that you would like your own child to be treated. This means taking care of repairs or maintenance in a timely manner and keeping the area safe.

4. Campus Access – Off-campus housing should not involve intensive daily commuting. Simply choosing a nice place to rent in the right city is not enough to ensure that a student will be able to easily access their classes. This is especially true in cases where the student will be relying on public transportation.

Assess the distance between each rental property that you are considering and the closest mode of public transportation that goes near the campus, both buses and trains. What’s the traffic like during rush hour? Are bus stops well lit at night? Do buses run reliably even in the evening? If the subway is involved, how safe and reliable is this service? Does the school provide shuttle service to the area where your child or your future renter will live?

5. Local Amenities – As appetizing as an area with lots of bars and restaurants might be to a college kid, it can spell disaster for their health. Look for communities with basic amenities: a grocery store; a convenience store; and a drug store. Are they all within walking distance? Do any of them offer student discounts? Is there a minimal care clinic nearby in case of emergencies?

As parents, we want the best for our children. A positive college experience is one of them. Where they live plays a huge part in that experience. When you find the perfect housing arrangement for your child, you are helping to make his college years memorable.

Freelance writer Nadine Swayne knows how crucial it is for parents to know what to look for and what questions to raise when shopping for safe off-campus housing for their young charges. Whether renting or buying, a local realtor can relieve some of the stress for parents and child.

Photo Credit: https://www.flickr.com/photos/hayesandjenn/4732804181/

Thank you for being part of our community of kind, thoughtful people who have respect for all.  Be sure to claim your  free download and find out how to have Judy Helm Wright aka “Auntie Artichoke” speak at your next convention or in-service.  You can contact her at http://www.judyhwright.com .. You will be glad you did.