Ask Auntie Artichoke

Expert on Parenting and Family Relationships

Ask Auntie Artichoke - Expert on Parenting and Family Relationships

Phrases to Build Confidence

When you build confidence, both in yourself and others, use strong words that evoke a sense of movement.

For instance; “I can do it” is certainly stronger than “I can’t do it.” Contrast that to “I choose to do it” which sounds more powerful and sure. The strongest is “I am going to do it! I will start right now and practice it every day until it becomes automatic action.”

Commit to Confidence

Making a decision that you can do something is great but making a commitment and an action plan is even better.  The Universe rewards action.  When you move forward, you will find assistance, guidance and doors opening for you.  Life actually becomes easier once you move in a forward direction.

In my many books and articles available at  you will find the words to say to bring about positive change.  I do this because sadly, many people have told me that they need the specific words and phrases because they have never heard them.

Phrases To Increase Self-Esteem and Confidence

Here is a list of 15 encouraging words and phrases that will assist you or your child to keep trying and increase self-esteem and confidence.

  1. “I like the way you handled that.”
  2. “Wow, you really thought out the solution to that problem.”
  3. “I have faith in your ability.”
  4. “I appreciate what you did.”
  5. “You are really showing improvement.”
  6. “I know you will figure out a good way to do it next time.”
  7. “You don’t have to be perfect. Effort and improvement are important.”
  8. “I trust you to be responsible.”
  9. “It must make you proud of yourself when you accomplish something like that.”
  10. “You are a valuable part of the team.”
  11. “It is okay to make a mistake, we all do. What do you think you learned from it?”
  12. “How can we turn this into a positive?”
  13. “I’m proud of you for trying.”
  14. “I’ll bet by next year you will be able to handle it, you just need to grow a little.”
  15. “I know you are disappointed that you didn’t win, but you’ll do better next time.”

Say Your Encouraging Words With Emotion

The stronger the positive statements spoken with emotion and deep meaning, the more the sub-conscious mind believes you and works to make it come true. That is why affirmations work. You are repeating positive statements with feeling and emotion.

Claim a copy of the audio book Affirmations For Abundance  at and listen to it daily for 21 days as you commute to work or walk around the park.  You will see a big difference in your belief system and inner confidence.

You deserve the best and I am confident in your ability to impact the world by influencing others to make wise choices through the use of encouragement and attracting the positive.


Join our community of kind, thoughtful people who want respect for all at

Responsible Children Make Responsible Adults

Parents want responsible children. The world needs responsible adults who will teach children in their circle of influence to assume personal responsibility.

Parents who allow children to experience the natural and/or logical consequences of their actions prepare them to be responsible, reflective, responsive, respectful and resilient adults. It is important to the future adults that we assist them to become self sufficient thinkers and problem solvers who don’t have to ask or be told what to do in every situation.

World of Work Needs Responsible Workers

As business owners, we found many of those who had fine educations and  technical skills did not know how to assume personal responsibility for their choices and decisions. It was as if we, the business owners and managers, were expected to re-parent people and teach them skills best learned as children.

Those young people who have those life skills of responsible attitudes and a work ethic, literally stand head and shoulders above other applicants.  They are the first to be promoted and the last to be let go in economic downturns.

Competent Kids Make Confident Adults

What does it take for parents to teach responsibility?  Every parent has a different answer and a different expectation of when and how their child will assume personal responsibility.  One thing is for sure ant that is responsibility must be taught.  It is not a natural skill and most of us would love to have others wait on and provide for us, but learn the joy of being in charge of our own lives.

Responsibility can be taught at any age, but is best when consistency and follow through is used in daily teaching moments.  You cannot expect a 35 year old job from a 10 year old. Nor can you expect a 10 year old to assume responsibility for a task unless he/she knows that the ownership of the decision or problem belongs to them. Parents may have to occasionally jump in and help them do an unpleasant task or problem solve, but not do it for them.

Encourage Children to Make Responsible Choices

The more the child has the opportunity of “owning” the decision or task, the more he/she will learn and the more their confidence will grow. The purpose of allowing natural consequences to occur and designing logical consequences is to encourage children to make responsible choices.

This is teaching, training and guidance not a method of punishment.  Parents should look down the road and envision their child in the world of work and help them learn problem solving skills.

You do not become responsible when you mature, you mature as you become more responsible.

For more information on teaching your children responsibility, please go to:

You will be glad you did!

In gratitude,

Judy H. Wright aka Auntie Artichoke, family relationship author and keynote speaker