Picky eaters get that way for a variety of reasons. Some are very sensitive to taste, texture and smell. The more your child is involved in planning and preparing the meals, the more he or she will enjoy them. Statistics say families who enjoy regular meals together have better job and school performance, less stress and more happiness. Never make a battle around food. Encourage good conversation and connections at the dinner table.
The best time to teach respect, responsibility and resiliency in when children are small. If you have out of control teens, it is not too late to set up boundaries of behavior. Fair, kind and consistent discipline is the best way to work with teens and pre-teens. You will want to read more at http://www.amzn.to/kindlebyjudy
Teaching respect is an important part of parenting. You cannot fake respect for others. Kids have a built in BS radar. They are very aware of adult’s moods, attitudes and belief systems. If we want them to practice kindness and respect for others, you must show respect and kindness to them.
Natural and logical choices are an important part of discipline, not only with our children but ourselves as well. When we forget to pay the light bill, the electricity is shut off. That naturally follows the action. What if there is not a natural consequence to an inappropriate choice? Then we create on that is tied in some way to the learning lesson. If a child does not pick up his toys as asked, then the toys are taken away for a period of time.
When we teach our children to be a kind and responsible person, we are really teaching three things: 1) Confidence 2)Character and
3) Critical thinking skills. This life-skills will stand them in good stead no matter what journey they may take in life.
Ernest Hemingway once said: “The world breaks everyone. and afterward ,many are strong in the broken places.”
When we are going through adversity, it is not always possible to believe that everyone suffers loss and heartache. It feels and acts very personal whenand rotten life experiences happen to good people.
Our first response is ““ We may question whether we did something to deserve this punishment or trouble. We may feel resentment for others who are not suffering and question why trouble did not choose them. We may even add up all the bad, selfish and dishonest things a certain friend or acquaintance has done and yet still has good and a big .
It’s Not Fair
Life isn’t fair. As a mother of sixI tried to hard at time to make the gifts come out even for everyone. No matter how many times I counted and then made lists and then recounted, on Christmas morning during the bedlam of presents, paper and toys, I would realize it hadn’t been fair. Someone had gotten a watch worth twenty dollars and someone had gotten a bracelet worth three dollars. Some one had gotten the exact doll she wanted and someone else got the one that was in style last year.
We finally decided to recognize and joke that no matter what we did, it was never going to come out even. But the joy was that you knew that the chances were good that one day it would be your turn to get exactly what you wanted. We would often recite the battle cry of large families and pre-schools around the world; “You get what you get, and you don’t throw a fit.”
Luck or Life
Life is filled with luck and also filled with change and chance. As Ernest Hemingway said earlier, we all get broken in some way and it is the broken places that make us strong.
Bad Luck is described as unforeseen occurrence, happenstance and yet good luck is described as prosperity,, windfall, success, advantage, profit and triumph, and blessings. It is often from the luck that the opportunities for growth and development come to us. When we take the chance to growth through loss, grief and adversity, we will become stronger and more resilient. I know this is true, because I have experienced in my own life and the lives of countless friends and .
Questions To Think About
- Do you consider yourself lucky or unlucky? Why?
- Have you ever said “That’s not fair.” Why?
- What do you think about when bad things happen to you?
- Can you look back in your life and recognize how a certain situation helped you to grow personally and spiritually?
You are a good person and have been drawn to this information for a reason. I have confidence in you and your ability to have a good life for you and your loved ones. If you would like assistance in living a balanced life please go to
Judy Helm Wright aka Auntie Artichoke, family relationship author and keynote speaker
PS: You will want to claim your books, articles and telecasts at
- Yikes, not fun to start the week with a headache. Remedy? suggestions? http://ff.im/h9gef #
- build a community of kind, thoughtful people who respect others, I have joined this org…. http://ff.im/h9gmw #
- Auntie ArtichokeAsks: Choose to learn new ways to deal with defiant children; see http;//www.DisciplineYesPunishNo.com #
- Have you or someone you loved lost a pet recently? You will want to go to http://www.deathofmypet.com #
- @queenmotherblog Auntie artichoke Applauds and Appreciates you. Hurrah for you. You deserve it. in reply to queenmotherblog #
- @TrueLoveAfter40 Hurrah for you. You have lots to teach us. in reply to TrueLoveAfter40 #
- is reading 'Judy Wright – Author Spotlight' http://blog.ezinearticles.com/?p=4568 #
- Auntie Artichoke Asks.. How are you teaching your children to assume personal responsibility? See http://www.kidschoresandmore.com #
- @PaulaEder Thanks Paula, you always have great tips and tweets to share. in reply to PaulaEder #
- @PaulaEder Who is this Stephen Wright.. Obviously a relative. Judy Helm Wright in reply to PaulaEder #
Hello from beautiful Montana:
Would you like to build confidence in your parenting skills? Do you sometimes wonder if your family relationships are on a roller coaster. One day the kids seem responsible, kind and thoughtful individuals and the next they disrespectful, defiant and rude. They push against the rules and boundaries and try your patience.
Don’t Be Discouraged, Be Consistent
We tend to think that teaching and discipline is like a diagonal line on a graph moving onward and upward. However, raising responsible children is more like the ocean tide. We move forward, we retreat, move forward once more, fall back. But we are always there.
The falling back and regrouping our strength and power can be discouraging to parents. The way to think about it is to envision the incoming tide. Then you can more easily see that after a falling back comes the moving forward. Each time we do that we are a little ahead of where we were previously.
There Are No Perfect Families
As humans, we tend to see ourselves at our worst and others at their best. Comparing our children, ourself or our situation with others will only lead to discouragement. Each family has unique problems and different battles to win. Look at your efforts and family with a loving attitude and a forgiving heart.
Understand that your children are not the symbol of your success in life. You can suggest, influence and give tools for improvement but you can never force another human being to change. Accepting others where they are is a basic principle for personal growth and self improvement in family relationships.
The only real tool in our parenting backpack to encourage positive action in our family which we have direct access is our own behavior. Children will be more willing to change and adapt more responsible attitudes when they see the important adults in their life assuming personal responsibility.
Consistent Guidelines and Unconditional Love
Once parents understand and grasp the notion that by changing our own behavior we can influence the unacceptable behavior, life gets much easier.
Like the tide ever moving towards the shore it has consistent actions. We can count on it ebbing and flowing. We want to be consistent in our expectations so the family knows what the boundaries are. Children need to know you will always love them unconditionally but may not approve of their actions.
As we encourage and support their positive actions and help them to understand the consequences for crossing the boundaries, they are better equipped to self govern.
Our love for our family and for ourself should not be dependent on behavior, but rather unconditional and never ending.
I have confidence in you that you will make wise choices for your family. You will learn new and more effective parenting skills and incorporate them in your life.
If you need additional assistance in order to build confidence in your parenting skills, you are invited to go to:
You will be glad you did.
Judy Helm Wright aka Auntie Artichoke, family relationship author and speaker
PS: You will also want to check out
Hello from beautiful Montana:
As caring adults(either by DNA or friendship) we want to create a safe and nurturing space in order to build strong family relationships. We also want the kind of family relationship where each child is a connected child within the family.
Here are a few ideas we have used in our family and have been suggested by other close families in my parenting classes. Use these ideas as springboards to decide what can enhance the relationships and build a strong family.
- Create an home environment where feelings can be shared This means that we give names to our emotions and not just feel mad, sad and glad. Even anger is an appropriate emotion at times. We need to continually be learning methods of expressing feelings without hurting others.
- Spend Time with the Kids The idea of quality time is over used. What kids want is just your time. They want you there completely when you are there. If you can only spare 15 minutes to play Candy Land, then be present for the whole time. Be involved in their activities with them.
- Be Open and Approachable With All Members of the Family Make an effort to be nonjudgmental and to listen to all sides of the story. Many parents just want to be “right.” For every situation there are at least five solutions so listen to your kids, they may teach you something.
- Let The Family Know That Love is Unconditional You may be disappointed at what they did, but are never disappointed with them as individuals. Make sure everyone knows that your emotional support and love are not tied to accomplishments, looks or achievements. We love each other in spite of…not because of.
Good luck in building strong family relationships. Trust me it is worth the effort to bind your tribe, family and group into a solid foundation of love and support.
I have confidence in you. If you would like more information on raising responsible children please go to:
Fondly, Judy H. Wright aka Auntie Artichoke, family relationship author and keynote speaker