Ask Auntie Artichoke

Hello from beautiful Montana:

We recently showed a rental property to a family searching for adequate and affordable housing. The mother turned to the child and said “what do you think darling, should we rent this house.”  The child shook his head and yelled NO at the top of his lungs.

Of course that is what most two year old children do. I was grateful they took the advice of their child (gimmee a break, people) and decided to keep looking.  It was pretty evident who wore the pants or diapers in that family.

Responsibility of Parent is to Lead

Many parents try too hard to be friends with their children rather than parents to them.  It is good to have a family where all members can be heard and acknowledged, but the parents job is to lead, teach and guide children.

It is actually scary to a child to realize that the power has shifted and he is in charge of the situation.  He, rightfully so, expects the adults to protect him and keep him safe. Firm, kind and loving discipline may not always seem like the most popular parental obligation. However, it is much more important to the child’s development than having another buddy to play with.

Children Should Challenge Authority

It is perfectly normal child development to test the limits, push the buttons and challenge authority.  Our job as parents and caring adults is to establish boundaries and assist them in learning personal responsibility.  The best lessons are learned through natural or logical consequences.

Assume Parental Leadership

The most secure children and confident adults have parents who recognized that family life was not a popularity contest but they were loved and protected.

You can’t lead and guide a child’s development by seeking his approval constantly.  You don’t want to say “Sweetheart, are you ready for bed?  It’s time for beddy by, okay?    You are opening up for arguing, whining and negotiation.

Instead simply make an announcement “It’s time for bed.”

I am excited to offer you a ten part e-course on raising responsible children free! I have taken the series and was so impressed I wanted to share with you. All you need to do is click http://www.DisciplineYesPunishNo.com

and a new lesson will come to your email box each day.

Have a great day with your children and remember you are the parent.

Fondly,

Judy H. Wright aka Auntie Artichoke, family relationship author and keynote speaker

PS: Here is the site again for the free e-course on responsible children http://www.disciplineyespunishno.com

Hello from beautiful Montana:

A friend on Facebook suggested that since I always brag about beautiful Montana, I should include some photos!  If I knew how, I would.  My 15 year old grandson is visiting, maybe he can show me.

Today’s tip concerns organizing your kitchen in a new house or apartment.

Because we were an Air Force family and moved frequently, I found that where ever the movers put things was usually where they stayed until it was time to move again.  I finally devised a method of “pretending” to fix a meal in order to establish the most efficient and labor saving methods of organizing the kitchen.

If you have been living in your home for some time, you may need to re-evaluate whether your cupboards are organized based on logical planning or habit.

Why is it that some of the things we need most often are buried in that cupboard from hell?  (Hey, we all have at least one cupboard that seems to be totally dark and goes back forever so things get lost and forgotten!)

Maybe you need to “pretend” you are just moving in and where do you want things to be so you can fix meals, clean up easily, store staples and then get on to the important things of life.  Spending time with your family and friends.

I would like to invite you again to join our weekly free teleclass every Thursday on some aspect of family relationships.  You can register at http://www.ArtichokePress.com  You will be glad you did and so will we.

Till next time,

With love and gratitude that you are part of my community,

Judy H. Wright aka Auntie Artichoke, family relationship coach and author